Immature Acts in my Life

I was watching a short film today in YouTube after the title made me watch despite the dislikes and discouraging comments. I don’t want to name it but it reminded me of the short film I was part of 10 years ago. Luckily it never came out in digital platforms but limited to college competitions. Though it came out worst it was added in every competition just to increase the entries, how horrible it was to watch same floppy video again and again.

We were immature youths trying to make a film just because others were doing it. I was an actor by the way, and direction, cameraman, cinematography everything was done by another single guy. When director friend came with the story, me and co-actor were really excited. We thought that should work out. Story was, two graduates join a college together. One person studies hard with geeky thoughts and other just flirts around without any goal. One moves to library and other moves to the gate after college hours. One spends full day in college and other just for the scheduled classes. First bencher and last bencher. There comes an instance when they define their goals to their friends, one to join a high paid job and other with meager one. As they end their graduation they both end up in same organization and same team. It is up to the watchers to guess if that would be a high paid one or the meager one.

But the way it came out was pathetic to the core. There was no clear sound recording, we were hand-carrying the cameras without gimbal or stabilizer. No lightings, it just showed our blurry images with some movements. At times the background music raised its tone at the actors. We all felt bad but the director was happy with the output. During the shoot it was him who made different takes to get a better shot. We never looked at the shot preview, it was all in his mind. He believed the shot was perfect. He made editing, invited us one day to dub without showing us the preview. Till the release, we were all excited to watch us in action. When it came out, we were covered with shroud of shame. We realized we did not effort much. Director watched the film again and again, but his mind never spotted the errors. People creating the movie watch it so many times before the release, still at times fails in being liked.

So what is maturity and what does it do?

Any life experience you face new and the reaction you represent to, is the test of your maturity scale. There are two types of reactions: Verbal and physical. Both are results of our thinking based on situation. First time in a verbal spat with a friend who betrayed me, we never spoke from mind, it was just the reflex reactions. Today we realize how bad we were when mind was jammed without preprocessing. First time receiving the graduation on stage, I never invited my parents. Later I realized when I saw my friends with their siblings and parents. Every time I see that picture, it reminds of my immature act.

Maturity is when your mind regrets your action and advices you to not be the same if similar situation arise in future. If possible, it also guides to go back to that person and get it corrected. It helps you to position yourself again in that situation and asks you a question. If you acted differently on that day, would that have made little worse? Self-Awareness is important for maturity. If there is no realization, there will be no improvement. Life teaches you lessons only if you are mature enough to analyze your past. If there is no maturity, you will believe your deeds are right. When you are always right, you will never look for pitfalls and you will fake yourself with false growth every day. In case of this verbal spat, it is better to acknowledge and leave the spot to converse later when the mind is stable. You can be wrong in what you did in the past, but mature act acknowledges your wrong and make you do right.

Think of your past which went terrible. Have you realized what actually happened on that day? Do you regret your act? Well you are on the right side of maturity scale.

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