Why Couple conversations are One-Sided?

We converse with fellow humans everyday. The common types of conversations we encounter are:

  1. Q / A
  2. Opinion Transfer
  3. Gossip
  4. Information transfer
  5. Action Invokers, etc

If two parties are involved, Q/A can be one way or two way depending on the situation. Same with other items but Action Invokers tend to be one way. I always get told by my mom to get up from my chair and reach the dining room to have my lunch or dinner. I don’t have a reply than to react.

Opinion and Information transfer can be two way if either of them have their opinion or information to share. If Opinion / Information gets triggered after a question, it becomes a Q/A. But I usually get involved in Opinion transfer after I see some videos from social media. “She would have avoided that big gown than to fall off,” I usually tell my wife after watching Jennifer Lawrences’ fall compilation. But she never cares, that’s a different story. Information transfers also happen in similar way but I tell people based on my reads. Even that gets ignored all the time. Rarely I get a feedback with an emoji if the conversation is digital. But live conversations remain inert.

So the theme of this post is, Why does my view or opinion get ignored? What do I mean by that?

I will be asked by my wife to choose the colour of the gown to wear for a party.

"Honey🍯, will I be pretty in Blue or White?"

"White is evergreen (Everwhite), it suits every time in every ceremony"

"But I think blue will be good for the party as it will make me unique and elegant."

"Ok then you go with blue"

Why am I asked about it then? She would have gone with blue right? It happens everytime we plan to go out or if we are already out, especially at restaurants.

"Should we order an ice cream and milk shake?" She checks.

"My stomach is almost full, I will have a scoop of Ice-Cream 🍨 maybe." I speak my heart.

"Even I am full. But two ice-creams will cost more. We can order a Milkshake with Ice and have it shared. What say?"

"Yeah, that would be a good idea. Order it"

Everytime she says “What say?”, as if she is going to listen to my opinion, I have to accept the offer. Ladies have an option in mind pre-decided but put forth for courtesy. If they make an action without asking the husband, they will be blamed for life. Instead, have the decision made and convince the husband. It is the best alternative to make the decision work in their favour. But I don’t know why my opinion does not equate to her pre-decision.

It is not the fault of my wife, it is there with every gentle woman I have interacted. Men will be acknowledging this universal truth if they are reading this.

Once I thought I should go with her choices she iterated previously. We happened to go to the same restaurant and it goes like this.

"Should we order an ice cream and milk shake?" She enquires.

"My stomach is already full . If you are too, we can go for a milkshake and have it shared."

"Sure, even I am full," She feels her tummy. I felt excited as my opinion got accepted.
"Which one to have? Vanilla or Mango?" She checks.

What should I tell now? What does she have in her mind? Ok let me try Vanilla ✌️😶🤞.

"Vanilla Babe" I pretend to be smiling 🤪.

"Summer is known for Mango , we can have Vanilla anytime. Let's go with Mango"

"Ok Babe, As you wish 😘"

I am never gonna make it !

2 thoughts on “Why Couple conversations are One-Sided?

Add yours

  1. When we decide to go out to a restaurant, my wife will say, “Anywhere is fine with me.” I will propose a Pizza joint but she had some pizza yesterday. Chinese? Don’t feel like it. And so on until I pick where she actually wants to go. I spent quite a bit of wasted time trying to point out the absurdity of this ritual. But after decades of it, I just accepted it as part of the experience of dining out!

    Liked by 1 person

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